What are repair attempts in couples therapy?

• A. Repair attempts are moments that escalate negativity.
• B. Repair attempts are informal conversations that casually ignore problems.
• C. Repair attempts are moments that reduce negativity, such as apologies, humor, concessions, and de-escalation.
• D. Repair attempts are solely about resolving logistical issues.

Answer: (C)

The idea being tested is how couples repair the emotional atmosphere after a moment of tension. Repair attempts are actions that calm things down and reconnect the partners when negativity flares. They aim to reduce the heat rather than escalate it. In therapy, you’ll see repair attempts as things like apologizing when you’ve contributed to the conflict, using humor to ease the mood, offering a concession, or making a move to de-escalate (pausing, softening your tone, validating the other person’s feelings, or shifting to a more collaborative stance). These behaviors signal that you want to preserve the relationship and keep the interaction from tipping into a full-blown argument.

They’re not about ignoring problems or just handling logistics; they’re about preserving emotional connection even while addressing issues. A repair attempt can be as simple as a respectful pause to listen, a brief apology, or a small gesture of empathy. Their effectiveness depends on both partners recognizing and responding positively to them; when they land, they help the couple move past a rough moment and return to constructive dialogue.